Chapter two; not SERIOUSLY INTENSE, but pretty awesome :)

I inhaled the last cloud of steam from the hot water and stepped out of the shower. Whipping the mirror with my towel I watched as my reflection became clearer. Footsteps shuffled passed the door and I figured the crowded game room had died down by now. Slipping out the door I double checked my towel and padded towards the bunk room, my hair still dripping wet I left a trail of water behind me. The lights still shone in the main room and the sound of clicking came and went in patterns. I rounded the corner and met eyes with a lonely Kennedy who was holding a controller and dressed in sweats and a t-shirt I bought him last fall. I stood there awkwardly smiling wrapped in a towel shaking from the change in temperature between the steamy bathroom and the chilly bus.

After a few seconds I cleared my throat, “where’d all the competition go?” I asked. Kennedy smiled. “I beat too many times, they had to give up and try and hold on to the last of their dignity,” he explained. I couldn’t help but laugh, Kennedy and I had pretty much the same sense of humor. We locked eyes again before I remembered I was still in a towel, “I’m uh, I’m gonna go change and then maybe do you wanna, I don’t know, try and beat me?” I suggested. Kennedy looked down at the controller and back up at me, “It’s a date.” We both laughed awkwardly and shook heads in agreement before I headed back towards the bunk room.

It was pitch black when I stepped inside; bunks above my head and at my waist were filled with sleeping guys, exhausted from the long day. Eric faced the wall in his bunk and slept quietly, I didn’t want to wake him so I tried as best I could to keep quiet while I grabbed my valise from under the bunk. Shuffling through I grabbed my tote bag and threw a bra, underwear, and pajamas inside. Inching the suitcase back under the bunk I checked to see if I’d awoken anyone, they all seemed undisturbed so I tip-toed back out into the hallway.

Kennedy still sat on the couch as I passed by swinging my bag, “I just need to change,” I explained. Once I reached the bathroom I got dressed as quickly as I could, throwing on my Stewie pajama pants Eric and I had bought at Wal-Mart the day before Kennedy and I broke up. Looking in the mirror I grabbed my brush off the counter and quickly ran it trough my sopping hair. Adding a little of Johns mouse, which I still didn’t know why on earth he had, I threw it up into a sloppy bun and threw my towel in the overflowing laundry basket.

Joining Kennedy on the couch he handed me another controller and wouldn’t take his eyes off the TV, if he was the one who wanted us to be friends why wasn’t he the one trying to be? “Kennedy?” I asked. “Oh, um hm,” he said still focused on the screen. “Do you really think it’s possible for us to be friends, you know after everything that happened?” I placed the controller down next to me and waited for a response. “I uh, I don’t know, I thought you wanted to play,” Kennedy said finally looking at me. “We could play,” I began, “we could sit here and play this pointless game until the sun comes up, but in the end we’d still be ignoring what’s going on between us.” Kennedy threw the controller on the floor, “there’s nothing going on between us,” he exclaimed louder than he should have with a bus full of sleeping guys, “we’re not anything anymore.” It’s not like I hadn’t heard this before, Kennedy and I had tried to talk things out before but it always ended with me walking away before the conversation was over, this time I wasn’t going to walk away. “Kennedy,” I whispered, “I know there’s nothing between us right now, what I mean is…” Kennedy interrupted me, “what you mean is, is that we aren’t going to be able to be friends if we don’t deal with what happened.” He had taken the words right from my mouth, “right,” I agreed.

Kennedy turned around to face me and we finally started talking, “look what I did, was a mistake, a big mistake,” he started, “and I know you’re never going to be able to forgive me.” I shook my head, “Kennedy, of course I forgive you, I…I can’t spend the rest of my life hating you. I just, I can’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore.”

“You love Eric,” Kennedy expressed. “Yes I do,” I began, “and you know that, you know it’s over between us Kennedy, Eric is…” Kennedy stared at the floor, “the one?” he asked. I knew Eric was “the one” but I didn’t want to go into too much detail about our relationship with Kennedy, so I simply shook my head in agreement.

We sat in silence for a few seconds before I finally built up enough strength to let it all out, “Kennedy, you and I, we were something I’ll never forget, but that part of me is gone. And I want more than anything for us to be friends but you know as well as I that it’s going to be hard. I love you very much Kennedy, you know that, but I’m not in love with you. I want to be able to have the kind of relationship with you that we can play video games until the sun comes up, and in the morning we can walk away and say, ‘well that was fun’. Not ‘that was awkward.’ So for us to be able to do that, I just need to know, will you be willing to let go of the past and just be us now, friends.”

Kennedy shook his head, “yeah I, I can do that,” he stuttered, “we’re friends.” I looked down at the couch and started laughing,

Kennedy looked up at me confused, “what? What’s so funny?” he asked.

“Remember that first night of Warped?” I laughed again, “we got so drunk.”

Kennedy smiled as he recalled the memory, “oh god, I remember that, you were 18 still and I thought we were going to get busted.”

The memories came flooding back, “haha you were so afraid we were going to get busted you made us leave the party early and come back to bus.”

“We sat here for hours,” Kennedy reminisced looking at the couch, “we just talked and talked.”

“And made out,” I added laughing, “for hours and hours.”

Kennedy smiled, “oh the good old days.”

We sat on the couch and talked for hours and hours, just remembering the good times, and sometimes the bad. But as we talked through it we realized that being friends wasn’t going to be that hard, as long as we remembered those “good times” were the past now, and that’s the only thing they’d be, memories of the past.

It was about 2am when I finally crawled back into the bunk with Eric. He sleepily turned over and routinely wrapped his arm around me, with his eyes still closed he whispered, “where’ve you been?” Laughing I whispered back, “oh just catching up with an old friend.”